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May Men In Motion | Michael Moran

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MEN IN MOTION

Editor’s Note:

When I first met Michael Moran at an event in New Jersey earlier in the year, I was mesmerized by his voice and quickly fell in love with his sense of humor. While he is very funny Michael is also extremely kind, giving, and diligent. Today, Nasreen Bhutta talks with Michael about his life’s journey. Enjoy! ~Steph

For the most part, I think that humor and learning to forgive myself for my imperfections and in doing that I’m more accepting of other people. I fail daily. I’m gonna fail every day, I’m human  and that’s okay too. 

~Michael Moran, Clear Vision Network
May Men In Motion | Michael Moran, www.clearvisionnetwork.com

Interview Transcript

Nasreen: Welcome to Bold Blind Beauty and Beyond Sight Magazine an online community where Real Beauty Transcends Barriers. Bold Blind Beauty’s 2020 A Year Of Vision Campaign also celebrates blind and visually impaired men. I’m your host Nasreen and for our main segment of our Men In Motion feature, our featured guest is Mr. Marvelous himself, Michael Moran. Mike is involved in podcasting, voiceovers, inspirational speaking, and is also a business owner and so much more! So let’s all give a warm welcome to Mr. Mike Moran. Welcome, Mike!

Michael: Well thank you, it’s a pleasure to be here. I didn’t know it was magnificent or marvelous or whatever you said but I’ll take it!

Nasreen: Absolutely! 

[both laugh]

Nasreen: We’re so proud of you to be here as part of Bold Blind Beauty’s community as well.  And just for everybody out there listening Bold Blind Beauty, we met up with Mike Moran in an event in Chicago, sorry, New Jersey. Sorry, wrong city Mike. [laughs] And since then Mike has joined our team and we’re really, really happy. So we wanted to really feature him on our Men In Motion segment. Mike, I want you to let me know how it feels to be on the other side of the hot seat? Usually, you’re on this side.

Michael: Yes, I know, this is quite a switch. And I feel like I don’t know where I am. I’m just in such shock I could be in Chicago, I could be in New Jersey now I’m really confused but go right ahead I’ll figure it out.

Nasreen: Mike, let’s start off with a little bit about your background. Can you share your journey of little Mikey with us to the present Michael?

Michael: Let me see if I can condense this. I was born with congenital glaucoma. I only had vision for light and color. I was very fortunate that my mother really had good instincts. She didn’t know very much about the formal aspects of rehabilitation, she went on instinct, and she was very good. She taught me things, she let me go out and get hurt. If I got hurt she put a bandaid on me and sent me out again and she did not hold me back. She wanted me to experience everything. I just love her for that, she was such a wonderful part of my life. She allowed me to be courageous.

Nasreen: That’s fantastic, a lot of parents, they try to shelter folks and kind of reform them into something that they should be bookshelved or delicate. It’s fantastic that she let you out there to experience sort of life as it is and say hey there, there if you take a fall you take a fall. If you achieve the goal you achieve the goal. That is keeping you in the norm and keeping it sort of centralized so you grow up understanding the whole environment around you. So hats off and kudos to her.

Michael: I want to say in defense of those parents who are unable to do that, I believe they have good intentions but sometimes they are afraid and they become overprotective without meaning to be. This is a new experience, let’s face it not every group of parents has a child with a disability. It’s a learning experience. I was fortunate that my mother just followed her instincts. I did attend a mainstream school. At first, I went to a residential school for blind children in Jersey City. It was run by the good sisters of perpetual revenge.

Nasreen: [laughs]

Michael: And they, you know my mother thought she was doing the right thing by sending me there and in retrospect, I have to say “ah, wrong move ma” but, it’s okay. [laughs] It toughened me up. In those days it was a different time so whatever the nuns said or the priest said or the elders said oh they must be right and the kid’s wrong. That was the philosophy in those days. We get through these things. I mean, nobody gets an easy ride in this world and some of us have a little tougher rides than others but it’s how we come out the other side that really counts. 

When I graduated I was the first blind student to go to a Catholic High School from my house. All the other students went to Catholic High School from the residential school for blind children. So I was the first child, I guess to be, as the name changes, mainstreamed or included or whatever it’s called. I didn’t follow the formula and I think I gave the nuns something other than what they were thinking they were getting. I think they thought they were going to get a blind child who stayed home, read braille books, and said the rosary. When I found out where the bad boys were that’s where I went. I was not a good student. I wouldn’t recommend other students who are blind do it the way I did it. But I hung out on the corners, I got in trouble, I got suspended from school, I got in all kinds of trouble. I have to tell you this [laughs] it was fun! I mean, we didn’t do anything to hurt anybody, you know what I mean? We weren’t some rough gang that was out there mugging people, it was all fun. You know we had a doo-wop group, we’d sing on the corner, sing for the girls. You know in high school it’s what can you do to make you stand out, you’re respected by your peers if you can do something. Well, I was one of the bigger kids and I could lift more weights than anybody, that was my thing. And the kids I was hanging out with, they must have had some kind of degree in rehabilitation because all they would do is, we’d be playing football and all they would do is hand me the ball and tell me to go up the middle and or whatever they were doing. Whatever we did we got in trouble together. If we were running I’d hold on to somebody and we’d take off. It was just a great experience and I think it really toughened me up. And in those days I also went to a camp for children who were blind. They weren’t worried about all the litigation that you have today. You know we had counselors who would wrestle with us and you know throw us out of a rowboat and make us swim back to the dock. And it was fun, it was great fun! And it really taught us if you were afraid, keep going, you won’t be afraid once you keep doing it.

Nasreen: That’s a great sort of mantra to share with everybody, you know, toughen up, keep doing it so shatter your fears. It looks like from your childhood and all the wonderful things and fantastic stuff you’ve done broke the barriers on a lot of areas where parents are really stereotypical when it comes to raising their children, not letting them venture out experience new things like things where you got suspended and played football and wrestle and all of that. Those are quote-unquote the norm things that every kid should experience growing up. I commend your mom for that, hats off to her. I don’t know how she kind of put up with all that sort of… 

Michael: I don’t know either. But you know, I have to say we can get children into society by making them aware of life not by shielding them from everything.

Nasreen: I also want to ask you what’s the most ambitious thing you’ve done to date?     

Michael: I don’t know, it’s hard to pick out because I’ve done some pretty crazy things. But I have to say I loved cross country skiing. I thought that was really terrific and I learned and I got a medal. I was so thrilled and I slept with the medal. As an adult man, I got this medal and I slept with it, I had to. I don’t know I traveled all over the country in my work. I’ve met so many different people. I’ve thrown out the first pitch at a baseball game. I don’t know, it’s hard to say what that is. When the book comes out we’ll try to figure it out. 

Nasreen: Oh, so you’re writing a memoir? Fantastic. [laughs]

Michael: I wasn’t until today but I’m just gonna ask you how are you with writing?

Nasreen: [laughs]

Michael: You may be my co-author. I’m signing you up right on the air.

Nasreen: Alright [laughs] we got a deal. Also, Mike, you have also done a lot of voiceovers and you’ve also done a lot of podcasting interviews so I have to you and I’m sure alot of people ask you this same question, but with all the tons of interviews you have done, national and state leaders… 

Michael: Yes

Nasreen: To sports celebrities who was your most challenging interview and why? 

Michael: They’re all challenging because the first couple of seconds, I call the joining process, and that’s really a key. I find that once I get started and connected with the person then it’s fine. So many wonderful people you know and everybody’s got, most people have positive things. I’ve never really interviewed controversial people.

Nasreen: I guess Trump won’t make your cut anytime soon huh?

Michael: I actually met him in an elevator.

Nasreen: Did you? Oh wow.

Michael: I was coming out of a basketball tournament in Madison Square Garden back in the 90s and he was on the elevator and I was on the elevator and I heard him talking. And I said to him are you, Donald Trump? And he said, “yeah, can I pet your dog?” And I said sure. And he shook my hand and he gave my dog a pet and that was that. And I said to him “you know what? You’re gonna be president one-day young man.” No, I didn’t, I’m only kidding.

Nasreen: [laughs]

Michael: It’s funny because for a guy who says he doesn’t like to shake hands, I had no problem, he shook my hand.   

Nasreen: Yeah, wow. I guess that’s something you’ll remember and cherish but I’m surprised you didn’t say…

Michael: I hope he remembers it, you know. If I ever meet him I’ll say “remember the elevator ride?” And he’ll, of course, have no idea what I’m talking about.

Nasreen: Of course, Mike you’re also part of the actor’s guild can you share with us how that journey came to be?

Michael: They’re combined now, it’s called SAG AFTRA which is Screen Actors Guild – American Federation of Television and Radio Artists. I was always fascinated by the guys who did voiceovers and those are the guys that did the prerecorded commercials. The guys at the end of the commercials or that read the whole commercial say, for example, Time Magazine or Ovaltine or something like that. In those days what you would do is you would go to an ad agency, audition for the spot along with god knows how many other people, and then you’d get a call if you’re lucky and you’d go and record the commercials and get residuals. The worst thing happened to me that could have happened to a new artist. The first commercial I auditioned for I got and it was a national spot. It was two baseball players, Tommy Lasorda and Steve Garvey from the Los Angeles Dodgers; it was for Swanson Hungryman Dinners and Entrees. All I had to say was “Swanson Hungryman Dinners and Entrees the second helping of meat is already in.” The mailman came every Monday and I’m thinking oh man, this is great. The residual checks kept coming in

Nasreen: Hmmhmm.

Michael: And I thought man, this is gonna be a cakewalk. Well, you know, come to find out it isn’t that way. So, Ed Macmahon did not move over and make room for me. I had to keep struggling [laughs] like everyone else.

Nasreen: Can I ask, how you did that? Were you using a screen reader? Which technology  devices did you use at the time 

Michael: No I just, in those days it was just braille. We punched out the dots either with a stylus or we did it with a braille writer. 

Nasreen: How was that received?

Michael: Once you get past the audition you’re in. They don’t care what you do because they know you’re going to get it done. That’s why you were selected. Sometimes it was hard to get auditions. This was a whole new thing: What do you mean the guy’s blind? How are we going to get the script to him? Budda bing. And some of these people they had you’d think the script was The Valachi Papers or something, they’d hold onto things like: “Oh I don’t know  if we want to release the script that early and ahead of time.” What? What is this a secret document? 

Nasreen: [laughs]

Michael: So, there were obstacles to overcome. Now it’s a different ballgame. I mean, people sit at their computers and they wait for the scripts to come down and read them into the computers.

Nasreen: Hmmhmm

Michael: As a blind person, I’m not that quick that I can just read them as they come down and send them in.

Nasreen: So you’ve been in a lot of things Ovaltine or like Swansons, Ore Ida, things I watched growing up or many other people watched growing up. So my goodness Mike, wow, that is fantastic. You should be so proud. We’re honored to know that part of you cause…

Michael: Well, thank you.

Nasreen: We always hear you asking us “hey how you doing?” “What’s your most ambitious thing?”

Micheal: Somebody said to me last week “you know, you don’t even know what you’ve done.” I said, you know, you’re right I have no idea. No idea until somebody starts asking me questions.

Nasreen: You definitely need to put that into a memoir book. [laughs] We’ll help you do that.

Michael: I hope so.

Nasreen: So if you had to define yourself in one word Mike what would that be and why?

Michael: Caring. It’s hard to come up with one word because I like to combine two things: that’s love and humor. I think that we can’t have one without the other. I mean you can have humor that can be damaging to other people and not beneficial and doesn’t fill people with happiness and joy. For the most part, I think that humor and learning to forgive myself for my imperfections and in doing that I’m more accepting of other people. I fail daily. I’m gonna fail every day, I’m human and that’s okay too. I just wanted to say I learned a very important lesson from a friend of mine, dear friend of mine, years ago who said to me: “Be serious about what you do but try not to take yourself too seriously.” And there is the challenge because we all tend to take ourselves too seriously. So you have to use that big three-letter word ‘TRY’ not to take yourself too seriously and in doing that I think it gives me a freedom because I realize I don’t have to carry so much weight on my shoulders. 

Nasreen: You know I think those are great inspiring words that can help, good for anybody because we all tend to be a little hard on ourselves, too serious, carry the burden or weight and the of the world or our imperfections. We want to change things so that we’re are quote-unquote perfect. I think you summed it up very well that way. We love your humor, that’s one of those things that we’ve come to know here at Bold Blind Beauty that your humor you are definitely a caring person and we experienced that when we were on the trip to New Jersey. And your humorous side is fantastic and I think that’s what sets you apart from many other people. Kudos to you for all that.

Michael: Well thank you. I have to say that we do all learn from each other. I’m not unique, I’ve had role models and maybe I’m a role model to somebody I don’t know, but I hope that we all inspire each other or influence each other in a positive way.

Nasreen: You are now embarking on a new business, you’re becoming a business owner and you’re putting together Clear Vision Network can you tell us a little bit about that?

Michael: What I’m trying to do is set up a podcasting service for people who can’t podcast or want to podcast but can’t do it themselves or needs some help. I’m willing to work with people at all levels so I can monitor and host the podcast for them or they can do it themselves and I can edit it and get it up on the platform. I can help them put it together, format the podcast, whatever it takes, that’s exciting to me. I was sitting around wondering what am I going to do? I wasn’t doing much I didn’t know what I was going to do next and I’m listening to podcasts and I said “oh I can do that.” And in addition, I really would like to give workshops and seminars for people who are blind or visually impaired. I think it’s important that we explore certain topics like work readiness, grooming for success, how to adjust to the work environment, and many other things that I think are important and sometimes don’t get talked about such as non-verbal communications for people who are blind or visually impaired. So there’s so many places we can go with these workshops and I think they’re much needed and I think what’s wonderful though is that a lot of the young people today are receptive the world has opened up to them…

Nasreen: Yeah.

Michael: through technology and they want to learn more.

Nasreen: Mike how can the general public reach you if they’re interested?

Michael: I’m going to give you my website which is clearvisionnetwork.com. So it’s two n’s C L E A R V I S I O N N E T W O R K.COM and my phone number is 201-906-8524.

Nasreen: Thanks so much Mike.

Michael: Well thank you for having me it’s been a pleasure really.

Nasreen: Thanks Mike, for sharing your journey with us and being our Man In Motion for May 2020. You can find Beyond Sight Magazine at www.boldblindbeauty.com. Thanks for listening. 

Special Thanks To:

  • Michael Moran, Our featured Man In Motion and BBB Advisory Board Member
  • Nasreen Bhutta, Interviewer and BBB Advisory Board Member
  • Daniel Lubiner, Graphic Designer and BBB Advisory Board Member

Image Description:

Featured image is the Beyond Sight Magazine cover. Michael’s photo is on the cover, he is dressed professionally in a jacket and tie while standing next to his guide dog Carson (a German shepherd). The masthead is teal with “Beyond Sight Magazine” in black text. The dot on the ‘i’ in ‘sight’ is the eye used for our 2020 Year of Vision Campaign (described HERE). There are 3 lines of white text that say “Mike Moran The Voice Like Velvet.” In the bottom left corner is a teal circle with an illustration of a blind man in motion with his white cane and “Men In Motion” is in yellow text under the circle.

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Rocking Forward An Audio Interview With Steph & Abby

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ABBY’S CORNER | AUDIO INTERVIEW

Editor’s Note

So recently I sat down with my creator, Steph to get a better understanding of how I came into existence. It was so cool talking with Steph, learning a little about her creative process, and eventually becoming the voice of Bold Blind Beauty. During our conversation, I mention two fabulous people Chelsea Nguyen, CN Vision Image Consulting, and Alexa Jovanovic of Aille Designs. You’ll hear more about these remarkable women going forward. So, sit back, relax, and listen to our conversation or if you prefer to follow along by reading I’ve provided the transcript. ~Abby

You’re someone who is persistent, you encourage other people, and you allow others to feel like there’s nothing that they
can’t do because of who you are.

~Steph’s Thoughts on Abby
Image described in the body of the post

Abby: Hey, guys. It’s me, Abby. I’m super excited to be here and it’s awesome! I’m hanging out with my creator, Steph, and she’s amazing, the creator of Bold Blind Beauty and me, the fashion icon Abby. How are you today, Steph?

Steph: I’m doing well, Abby. How are you?

Abby: I’m feeling so alive! I mean, there’s so much that you and I have done together, and as many lives as we’ve changed and people that we’ve met, it’s just super exciting! Don’t you think?

Steph: It’s extremely exciting to know that you came about from the idea of all the blind and visually impaired women around the world who are doing amazing things and focusing on what we can do versus what we can’t do. It’s just amazing to me.

Abby: It is, and I feel like the fact that I was created by taking parts of different women that are everybody… I mean, people that are like super outgoing, people that can rock stilettos and have our canes and we don’t care because we know that we’re awesome!

Steph: It makes me happy knowing that you’ve come to life. You were just an idea, and to know that life was breathed into you from a mere seedling of an idea, a combination of every blind and visually impaired woman around the world is just something I could only dream of. And now to know that you are here totally blows me away!

Abby: It does me, too, and I love the fact that we’re doing this. But let’s talk about those dreams. What were you thinking of when you were dreaming of this personally?

Steph: Personally, what I was thinking was, my own personal experience of losing my sight, and how people looked at me, was how to help them understand that just because I use a white cane or because I can no longer see doesn’t mean that I’m less of a person, that I still have value, and that the white cane is simply a tool that I use to now navigate the world.

Abby: Yeah, and I think we rock ours very well with our stylish clothing and our impeccable makeup that we learn to do from so many people like Chelsea, and we have our fashion designers like Alexa and all of the fun people in our lives. I don’t understand how a cane can be looked at in such a way of negativity. I think it’s almost fear. Don’t you?

Steph: I do and honestly, that’s the way I had to look at it. Before I started using the cane, I, too, looked at it as a negative. I felt that using the cane would make me a victim. I felt like I would have a target on my back. I didn’t look at it as a tool of empowerment until it came down to the point where I had to use it and today, I’m so happy to say that I go nowhere without my cane. As a matter of fact, if I do, perchance, when I’m out somewhere and I lean it up against something to look at something close up, if I walk away, I feel naked without it. So I have to have my cane with me everywhere I go, and I’m so happy.

Abby: I myself was so incredibly nervous at first, but the more and more confident you got, I believe as my creator, the more confident I got to be able to rock my cane, too. I couldn’t have been able to go do the amazing things I’ve done all over the world and met the amazing people had it not been for your strength. So tell us. How did you get over that fear?

Steph: Getting over the fear of using the cane, it took some time, it was a process. I can’t pretend that one day I woke up and I wasn’t using the cane, then I woke up and started using it, it was not like that. It was something I had to go through and it’s different for everybody. Not everyone looks at the cane initially as a negative thing, there are some people who look at it as the tool that it is a tool of empowerment. They know that it is a gift of independence, but for me, it really took some time. After I had my orientation and mobility training, I had to really think about it. I put it away, I put it in a closet and I just needed time to think. But while I was thinking, of course, I was living and in so doing, almost got hit by a car on a route that I traveled regularly. Because I knew the route, I thought it was safe. It was during that time that I realized I needed to rethink some things.

Abby: Yeah, I think you made a really good point, there’s a point in every person’s life men and women alike that we do have a yikes moment and ours (you and I) just happens to be blindness. But it’s still going through that process of living and figuring out who we are and still rocking forward. So tell us how did you get to that point where you were like ‘okay I’m done with the fear of blindness and being able to bond with it, because I feel like we had to get over that first before we could embrace our canes as power? Talk about what that was like.

Steph: That too was a process. What I had to do was accept my new normal. I had to accept the fact that I could no longer do things that I used to do the way I used to do them. I had to learn how to do things a little bit differently. I think one of the major fears of blindness is the fact that people feel they’re out of control, and the way I had to look at it was, number one, I’m not in control of much anyway as far as life is concerned, and I would have to learn how to trust, and I think the cane taught me that. Because the distance between my feet and the farthest the cane can reach, that’s all the further that I can really see. I can’t see beyond that, but that’s OK because as long as I’m within that perimeter with my cane, I’m good to go. So it was sort of a combination of learning to trust, learning to do things differently, learning to trust myself and above all, learning to accept my disability.

Abby: And how much power is in that, finding acceptance?

Steph: There is so much power in finding acceptance! Finding acceptance helps to wipe away the fear, and if not wipe it away, at least it makes the fear more manageable. I was so afraid when I was told I was legally blind and that there was no more the doctors could do for me. All I could think of was what I couldn’t do, how my life was going to be impacted and all the things I wouldn’t be able to achieve. I didn’t think that I could still achieve those things but achieve them in a different way. So once I got to the point where I could accept the fact that I could no longer see, that was when I felt empowered.

Abby: And that’s the day that I was born.

Steph: Yes it was!

Abby: Let’s tell everybody about what all I am.

Steph: Oh my goodness! There are so many things that you are! You’re everything that I wanted to be. You’re my alter ego. You are strong. You’re a go-getter. You just don’t let anything stop you, and yet at the same time, you’re vulnerable.

Abby: Tell everyone what all I encompass, for you, and for other women that you’ve met, sighted or not.

Steph: Abby, you encompass everything I’ve ever wanted to be within myself, and really, when I view other women, you’re strong. You’re outgoing. You’re unafraid to face obstacles. You know that these things exist, but yet, you are the type of person who looks at them as opportunities. You don’t look at obstacles as something that is going to take you down or something that can hold you back. You’re just someone who is persistent, you encourage other people, and you allow others to feel like there’s nothing that they can’t do because of who you are.

Abby: I can’t imagine being anybody else than the person that you’ve created me to be, and what I want to tell everybody is, I’m so glad to be here! I’m so glad to be talking! You guys are going to see so much coming from this amazing woman and my creator and myself! We’re going to take on the world and we’re going to bring it to you, because together, we are strong and we are going to squash fear, one cane tap at a time, in our stilettos with our fashion and our fun and our purpose. That’s who we are. High five to you, Steph.

Steph: High five right back you, Abby.

Abby: For now we’re out, guys, but stay tuned. Can’t wait to correspond with you. Check out my fashion tips, my fun, my adventures, and my vulnerability. Because I share it all.

Be well and be safe everyone. I leave you with a song I’ve claimed as my anthem. Enjoy!

Special Thanks To:

Image Description:

A graphic of two intertwined speech bubbles

  • In one bubble Abby says: I myself was so incredibly nervous at first, but the more and more confident you got, I believe as my creator, the more confident I got to be able to rock my cane, too.
  • In the other bubble Steph says: There is so much power in finding acceptance! Finding acceptance helps to wipe away the fear, and if not wipe it away, at least it makes the fear more manageable.
  • Photo of Abby in Central Park on a sunny afternoon. She’s looking chic in a teal tank top paired with gray joggers while posed kneeling next to her retired guide dog, Alexis, a beautiful Yellow Lab. As in all of her photos, Abby is sporting her signature explosive hairstyle.
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The Power Of Three On Confidence & Style After Sight Loss

Terese Goran's image is described in the post.

“When you base your confidence on who you are, instead of what you accomplish, you have created something that no one or no circumstance can ever take away from you.”

~Barbara De Angelis

Today’s Woman On The Move and fashionista, Terese Goran offers her insight on the topic of confidence for those new to sight loss. Terese was featured on Bold Blind Beauty last week, you can check out the article here: Blind Beauty 77 | Terese Goran

Early Love For Fashion & Makeup

I have to confess, when I was asked to write this, I wasn’t sure how to contribute. Personal style and confidence in how we look are so important to our identity. Growing up I really struggled with the way I looked, frequently hearing comments about how my eyes looked funny. Even at the age of 50, there are still some days where I lack confidence in my appearance. When I was growing up, my parents owned and ran a ladies fashion store, and this is where I developed my love for clothes and makeup.

As someone who has been legally blind all my life, I can’t speak to knowing what it’s like to lose my vision, because I never had it to begin with. However, in my career as an Assistive Technology Specialist, I work with a lot of people who are at the beginning of their vision loss. Most of these people are trying to come to grips with their situation. They may still be overwhelmed and not realize that it is still possible to do most things, even without vision. One question that I get asked repeatedly is “How do you get dressed?”. The simple answer is one step at a time.

Easy Answer To A Simple Question

It is such a simple question and a task that many take for granted. But no matter what your vision situation is, looking and feeling confident and put together can be possible. So here’s my advice:

First things first. Be open to learning to do things in a different way than you have done them in the past. There ARE ways to do practically anything you want to, from putting on makeup to matching your clothes, but they will likely be different than how you did them before. You have to be open to learning new ways of doing things.

Secondly, take things one step at a time and be patient with yourself. Learning to do things in new ways will take time and practice. I’ve had to develop my sense of feel over the years to tell where my makeup is applied. I don’t mean by paying attention to what my fingers feel, but how my face feels as I run my fingers over it.  I have to first put it on and then look in the mirror when I’m done to see how it turned out.

When it comes to makeup and clothing, some days things come together better than others. I remember quite a few days that I thought my clothes matched and when I left the house I realized they clearly don’t. To help with this, ask people that you trust for their feedback. I’ve had a lot of help from my family. They aren’t afraid to tell me if I look like a hot mess. Moms, sisters, and nieces are good like that, but if these aren’t available, close friends or even significant others can give helpful feedback. 

Speaking more generally, I’m a big believer in the power of three. Pick your base, sweater and pants or dress, then add 3 pieces to bring the outfit together. This may be shoes, a necklace, and a jacket. It could also be a hat, belt, and earrings. It could even be your eyeglass frames, handbag, and your cane. Whether you’re in work clothes or a t-shirt and jeans the rule can still apply.

I know this world is all about “the look”.  Almost every morning I strive to put myself together. What’s more important is the confidence and belief in yourself. The truth is you can be dressed to the 9’s but if you don’t have the confidence to back it up then that look isn’t going to work. At the end of the day, I just want to be the best me I can be.   

Image Description:

In this photo of Terese, she is looking very stylish in jeans, a burgundy top, and a long taupe sweater. She paired her outfit with a gold statement necklace and brown peep toe, sandals with a block heel.

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Managing Social Anxiety & Sight Loss

Managing Social Anxiety & Sight Loss

While appearing confident is important it’s more important to articulate what our needs are. Because I appear as if I’m in control people forget I can’t see and sometimes this hurts more than helps. I think part of my struggle here is the delicate balancing act of being confident yet knowing when to request assistance.

Bold Blind Beauty

These Four Walls

Recently I’ve talked with several of my blind & visually impaired friends about managing social anxiety and blindness. For many reasons, anxiety, as it relates to our sight loss, is a topic we don’t talk about frequently. On a personal level, one of my reasons is simply the fear of my fear. I feel like if I talk about it all the scary things in my mind they will come into existence. So how do I handle social anxiety and sight loss? The easy answer is I fake it.

Truth be told I’ve always lived with social anxiety and my blindness kicks it up several notches. A panic attack always lurks just beneath the surface whenever I’m in unfamiliar or heavily populated open spaces.

When you can only see blurry shapes, colors, and movement, it’s not ideal. Adding noise to this equation can overwhelm my senses compounding the anxiety. For example in a shopping mall environment, the expectation would be humans and service animals here and there. Without any central vision, I cannot see fine details so people’s faces are nonexistent. Whenever my grown children come by they have to identify themselves so I know who they are. So imagine being in unfamiliar territory with unknown people—no one stands out even people I know.

While being within the confines of my home makes me feel safer than anywhere else there are some challenges. When I’m home alone I know exactly where everything is, on the flipside when my son and grandson are here it can be chaotic. I rely on everything being in its place but when you share living space, there are bound to be problems.

The Moment Of Truth

Since retiring several years ago, my life mainly revolves around being at home on my computer. Blogging and social media have given me an outlet to connect with and live life vicariously through others. Even so, there is the inevitable grocery store run, doctor’s visit, or an occasional special outing that requires leaving home. Then there’s the dog.

As an animal lover and dog owner, it’s my responsibility to walk my Mollie. One would think that since I’m familiar with the area where I live this would be an easy thing to do right? Nah, it’s not that simple. See I live in a condominium complex without sidewalks which means I have to be constantly alert. In addition, I cannot use my cane when walking Mollie which makes me more vulnerable as drivers don’t know I can’t see. Many of my neighbors also don’t know I can’t see because I guard my privacy—so there’s that.

Today was a minor turning point for me as I admitted my fear and pushed through anyway. The first day at a new gym can be a little unsettling to anyone I suppose. For me, I was downright terrified but I’d put it off long enough and decided to be honest.

Because I’d called in advance the facility was expecting me but I opted not to disclose my disability until in person. With white cane in hand, I followed my son into the building. Once inside I met Tammy, the owner of the gym. I briefly explained my fears and she immediately put me at ease. She explained the gym’s offerings and told me she’d create a workout plan for me in large print. I was over the moon and may for the first time ever, take a couple of classes.

Lessons Learned

Today was a very good day. Was I still anxious? You bet I was! But being upfront with Tammy about my blindness and explaining what I can and cannot see helped her to help me. For far too long I let my fear control me and was afraid of being vulnerable, judged and appearing foolish.

I also think that while appearing confident is important it’s more important to articulate what our needs are. Because I appear as if I’m in control people forget I can’t see and sometimes this hurts more than helps. I think part of my struggle here is the delicate balancing act of being confident yet knowing when to request assistance.
Since empowerment is a key component of Bold Blind Beauty I sometimes feel torn about admitting my perceived flaws. Then there’s another part of me who understands that real empowerment and confidence comes from knowing when to seek help. It is not a sign of weakness to ask for help.

My anxiety like my blindness is a part of me and will more than likely remain with me until my last breath. I do have a few additional tips that I’ll share at a later date. For now, though, I’d love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Do you ever talk about your fears?

Managing Social Anxiety & Sight Loss Image Descriptions:

The featured image, as well as the gallery of three photos, are of me on the treadmill. I’m wearing navy exercise capris, teal tank top, teal & navy sneakers and navy knotted head scarf.