Learning To Be Present Through The Loss Of Sight

“I never thought I could “go through that” until going through “that” was the best alternative.”

Being a pragmatic person who has to have loads of information, then weigh the pros and cons, when faced with a situation where the path forward appears murky I try to find another path. When my eyesight began dwindling away and pathways to vision restoration closed down I was stopped in my tracks.

Residing in a state of denial during the span of time from when I was declared legally blind up until I needed to begin using the white cane was my new reality. The fear wasn’t so much the blindness rather it was the not knowing what was ahead.

Since the decline of my eyesight was so severe it was excruciating not being able to see further than my new limitation. The white cane became not only my lifeline but the tool that would be my eyes so that I could relax and travel safely.

I feel so vulnerable when I take my dog, Mollie, outside because it’s not practical to use my white cane. Without the cane, my steps are a little unsure and I have to trust Mollie to warn me if an animal or person invades our space.

It occurred to me that it’s within this range of either Mollie or my white cane that I’m safe. No, I can’t determine what’s beyond the range but that’s okay because all I have to concern myself with is where I’m at now.

On Mother’s Day, I felt that same sense of safety as me and several family members had dinner with my mother at the nursing home. We laughed and had such a great time enjoying each other’s company I didn’t even look at my phone except to take a picture of my grandson.

I know that time is winding down not just for my mother but all of us. More and more each day I am given I enjoy my loved ones and can’t imagine what life would be like without them.

Life is way too short to waste it focusing on things we have no control over. Live life now and be in the moment.

Low Key Ensemble

What I wore: Ann Taylor black tee (old), black leggings, black crisscross heels | DSW, gray long hooded vest, and of course my white cane. I wore a long silver toned tassel necklace, cuff bracelet, and earrings.