When I succeed, I am proud of myself but don’t take it as a blind girl win. When I fail, I forgive myself and think of an alternative way to succeed.~Jenna Faris
Sight Loss Story Is More Than Meets The Eye
My sight loss story has no true beginning or end as I was diagnosed with congenital blindness at four weeks old. For reasons unknown to anyone, my limited vision declined steadily throughout my life. Blurry shapes and contrasts I could make out at five years old are now mere memories. Perhaps what little I can see today will one day be a memory, as well.
Not much is known about my family’s rare hereditary condition. It doesn’t have a name, and there is no cure for it.
With half of us blind, and the other half sighted, my family is split down the middle.
Since I was legally blind at birth, I never went through that difficult transition period of growing accustomed to sight loss. But, that is not to say my journey has been without challenges. Instead of facing the realities of vision loss, I had to face my sighted peers’ perception of blindness. I was raised in a family where blindness was simply viewed as a personal characteristic, like hair color or favorite food. It was a shock to find that the majority of the world viewed blindness differently. Many see it as a great limitation, a heavy, shameful burden, and an insurmountable barrier that would affect every aspect of my life.
More Than My Disability
Throughout my teenage years, I struggled to prove that I was just as good, worthy, and capable as my sighted friends and siblings. I battled bullying, an eating disorder, and blind brothers who were arguably better at being blind than me. Failure, I felt would prove everyone right, and success would prove everyone wrong. So I went out of my way to oppose stereotypes because I hated being known as the blind girl. It was important for me to break the mold and to stand out for anything other than my lack of sight. Making a point of wearing makeup, and refusing to wear sunglasses. I made a point of wearing makeup, absolutely refused to wear sunglasses, and I threw myself into my education. My urgent approach to my studies could only be described as obsessive because I wanted to be known as the:
- A+ student
- chick in the blue shirt
Any title would do, as long as it did not center around my disability.
I can’t recall freedom from the gut-wrenching feeling of failure when someone referred to me as the blind girl. Maybe it faded around the time I connected with cool blind people my age. All I know is, one day the words didn’t make me feel bad anymore. I am a blind girl however I am not ‘the blind girl,’ but maybe to them, I am. The phrase no longer makes me feel less than what I am, it merely reminds someone of who I am. While I know my blindness doesn’t wholly define me, if this characteristic stands out to most people, that’s fine. I know I am more than my disability, and if they get to know me, they will too.
Empowerment Gained Through Acceptance
Today I refuse to wear sunglasses not to prove a point, but because they limit my vision and light perception. I now wear makeup when I feel like it, because it makes me feel good inside. And I achieve in school because I know this will further my career. When I succeed, I am proud of myself but don’t take it as a blind girl win. When I fail, I forgive myself and think of an alternative way to succeed.
I recently graduated with a bachelor of science in food, nutrition, and health from the University of British Columbia. This summer I’m working part-time as a server while scoping out further career options and working on my book series. I’m just your average twenty-something dreamer with a whole life of possibility ahead.
My sight loss journey may never truly be over, but I’m okay with that. I hope it continues to help me become the human I want to be.
Connect with Jenna:
- Blog: www.safespace4all.wordpress.com
- Facebook: @JennaFarisOfficial
- Twitter: @JennaFaris
- Instagram: @JennaFaris
Sight Loss Story Is More Than Meets The Eye Featured Image Description:
Jenna stands at the back of a cruise ship. She wears a deep blue shirt that matches the ocean and sky behind her. Her dark brown hair streams down her back as she smiles serenely at the camera.