Beauty Is A Tapestry Of Inclusivity

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“Oh, Look She Knows Where She’s Going!”

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Have you ever left your house feeling so good that nothing could bring you down? You know, those days when you’re sporting a new hairdo, outfit, manicure, or you’re just feeling flat-out fabulous?

Recently, I had such a day. The weather was gorgeous and I was so looking forward to lunching with several friends I hadn’t seen in a while.

After my ride dropped me off, and I headed to the meeting place I heard a woman say “Oh, look she knows where she’s going!” An innocent enough comment and I suppose it didn’t have to be about me, after all, there were a number of people milling about the outdoor plaza. However, since I heard it just as I passed by slightly irked me.

I mean here I was, all decked out in my new cork mules, coordinating top, white jeans, and gray hooded vest. Granted my mules were a tad high and I get how the idea of heels and white cane use may seem incongruous but could there be more to the story?

What the person didn’t know about me was number 1, yes, I knew where I was going because I worked there for 13 years. Number 2 the significance of the white cane doesn’t mean a person can’t hear.

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One of the core messages of Bold Blind Beauty is transcending barriers by changing the way we perceive one another. The only way to achieve this goal is by sharing our stories, getting out there and living.

All too often we make assumptions and come to conclusions without knowing the full story. Social media help fuel a massive amount of misunderstandings because people don’t read an entire message, take it out of context or believe something simply because it’s posted. It is so easy to have our say with a couple of keystrokes it almost seems like we forget the targets of our comments are human.

People with disabilities are human, people without disabilities human, people with deformities are human, people without deformities are human, people of different cultures, races, rich, poor, overweight, underweight, young, old, tall, short, well, sick are all human.

Could we try to think before we speak or hit a key on the keyboard? While I know there are many who wouldn’t agree, this world is beautiful because of its diversity.

What I Wore:

Sleeveless navy top with tiny polka dots, white jeans, navy cork block heeled mules, light gray hooded vest, silver jewelry, and my white cane. In the photos, I am standing in front of my counter.

A different world cannot be built by indifferent people. ~Peter Marshall

Have a great day!


  1. You’re welcome.💗 Your comment made me giggle because I’m imagining my kids response to me being wise.🤣 They are so silly I must pass this on to them for a response.

  2. Thank you Peta💖 You’ve made some very good points here. As I was hearing it all I could think was that the focus was placed on the white cane. Obviously there were assumptions on both parties, the woman who made the statement and me. Being that this sort of thing happens pretty frequently when I’m out with family and friends who can see the stares, when I’m by myself I’m focusing so intently on where I’m going. I agree with you that if it was sort of a back handed compliment I think it was one that should have remained in her head. I get that people can be astonished at something they “think” is almost miraculous but this is one of those things where we are working to build awareness.

  3. Hey Steph seriously you look great, perfect heels, Man thoughts 101 (if a woman can walk in them with class they are not too high), and that hair! Love your blog now stay out of trouble.

  4. Steph I love your outfit, especially the hooded light grey cover up. I too thought that the person gave you a compliment. Hopefully. But I can also understand how you could see it as otherwise. I am thinking that much would depend on the tone in which the comment was said. I read it as…wow, this woman is dressed elegantly and she knows what she wants. Or the opposite, which could relate to her response to the cane and surprise that you woukd “know” where you are going. I think we all make assumptions about strangers and maybe could restrain from making comments aloud about thrm, UNLESS they are complimentary.

    You totally rock the outfit!


  5. Good, because I meant to say the lady’s comment was a backhanded compliment. Methinks I better shut up. 😳
    Great blog post!!!

  6. You are almost as tall as Sandy. You are both proportioned well and look great. You are striking; is that better? It was a bit of a backhanded compliment, which is why messages like yours today are so important.

  7. Thank you for the compliment. After reading George’s response I think might have to agree with you as she may not have meant it the way it came out. Yeah, I don’t know there’s a tendency to raise our voices when speaking with people with disabilities, this topic might make an interesting post. I think I’ll raise the subject in a few groups I belong to and take a poll.

  8. Oh wow. See, looking at it from this perspective never occurred to me George. Just one minor correction though, I’m actually not very tall, only 5’3″ 😅😅 I only appear that way when I’m wearing heels. Which is precisely why flats make me feel so uncomfortable because I’m painfully aware of how short I am. 😉

  9. Thank you and don’t feel bad. We all have bad days and regret things we do or say. I think the most important thing to takeaway is doing the best we can. I’ve had those gut reaction moments where I’ve behaved so badly that even after apologizing it just didn’t seem like it was enough. In older age I’m learning to restrain my tongue and weigh my words very carefully.

  10. Love the outfit. You are always so well put together. I’m glad that you took the high road and didn’t lash out at the person. I’m sure she was impressed by your confidence and didn’t mean to be demeaning. That being said, she really should have thought before she spoke and considered how it would sound to you. I thought it interesting that you said the white cane doesn’t equate to being deaf. I have a friend who used to work with the mentally disabled and he was impressed when I met one of his clients and didn’t yell at them. He said, for some reason, most people will speak loudly to the disabled, like they can’t hear. What he didn’t know was that it took all of my might not to. I wonder why that is? Anyway, I am now conscious of that fact and try to keep a normal tone, regardless of who I am speaking to.

  11. Steph, your outfit is wonderful. So are your comments.
    I think the lady was giving you a compliment. It came out in the form of ableism, however. But maybe it wasn’t ableism. You are tall, well dressed, all put together. Moving easily with your white cane you fit the description of a person who “knows where she is going.”
    You do know where you are going, and it shows.

  12. So insightful, Steph. I kind of wish I could have read something about three weeks ago. You know, to remind me to think before speaking? I haven’t been doing so well with that lately. 🙁

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