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WOTM 44 Featuring Megan Darcy

A 5K Blindy Moment

Photo of Megan looking very happy with herself immediately after aforementioned fabulous 5km. She is smiling for the camera wearing a black ball cap and tank in multiple shades of blue.
Here is Megan looking very happy immediately after her fabulous 5K

It may have cost me a pajama day on the lounge, and some serious toddler treat negotiations with Little (Emily) so I’d have to actually parent. But the cognitive overload and exhaustion was oh so worth it.

Guess who challenged her bad arse self to a solo park run with nothing but a sketchy mental map, a trail cane, a buzzy thing, and a Running Rope on her hip in case she made a friend along the way? Oh God but no sunglasses. Why oh why didn’t I retrieve them from the kitchen bench?

Okay, so technically I wasn’t alone, as my sister and husband were on the course, along with a gaggle of walkers, runners, and volunteers. Which was probably just as well given how inaccurate the construct of my narrative was regarding the route. I had only done the course once before early in the year.

I spent much of my run having no idea where I was, confused about what I didn’t know, relying on the shadowy shapes of the world, whispering of the wind, the footsteps of others, and faith in my madness and mobility skills to guide my path, which meant that passing the blue shirt in front was a risk, because what if I missed the next turn? Which of course I totally did on almost every occasion.

So thank you to all who provided directions when I inevitably needed them. Every stride was fraught with dilemma, and was a fight against evolution. What if I fell? What if I went the wrong way? What if I ran into someone?

But just keep going, because I was having too much fun. My cane in one hand bounced awkwardly in front of me, hampering my form. While the buzzy thing which vibrates when it detects obstacles within a particular range proved useless. I wanted to ditch them both, because they were slowing me down, but how would people know to give me a little more room, or more understanding.

The Charles Bonnet* hallucinations didn’t kick in until about 1500 m, and that is when things got interesting. But still I kept putting one foot in front of the other, and wondered why it felt so hard and heavy, when in my head i see myself as moving with grace, lightness, fluidity, and sweet, sweet synergistic freedom.

Should I stop? Nah because that would suck!

Breathe in, breathe out… Surely the turnaround point is somewhere.

I don’t remember this part. This is more complicated than I thought. Everything looks the same. Where am I? Bla bla bla.

I was pulled from the white noise of my mind when my trusty cane failed at the 3500m mark. I was just considering whether to fold it up and run without it, or… umm… actually there was no or. I mean how hard could it possibly be right? Sure I had no idea where the finishing line was, or in fact where I was in relation to my ambition. But I had this. And this was awesome!

And that is when it happened. That is when I finally made a friend. That is when Charles stopped to ask if I needed any help, and if we could run together. And the rest is beautiful history.

An avid runner, Megan is also a wife, mom, fashionista, and author of Blind Mama. If that weren’t enough, when Meg puts on her entrepreneurial hat, she runs Taylored Thinking, maker of creative fashionable accessories and athletic gear for people who are blind or visually impaired. 

*Charles Bonnet Syndrome (CBS) is a common condition among people who’ve lost their sight. It causes people who’ve lost a lot of vision to see things that aren’t really there – medically known as having a hallucination.

8 thoughts on “WOTM 44 Featuring Megan Darcy

  1. Wow. Well done to Megan. Now walking I do -running no way (between bad back, knees and hips and lack of basic coordination running is beyond me) so I have nothing but admiration for people who run.
    For me my Charlie Hat Moments (Charles Bonnet Syndrome) can be scary or funny. Scary when a velociraptor is standing by the shops and starts walking towards me. Funny when candy floss all pink and fluffy floats towards me. It is rare that there isn’t something real that triggers the hallucinations and it is mostly easy to spot them because they are in focus and my world in reality is a total blur. Sometimes I can break them and override my brain but mostly I just have to remind myself that is not reality (especially when they are scary.)

    1. Awe Lynne, I wasn’t aware that you had these issues as well. I’m glad you commented though because I need to ask you something. Can you send me an email at smccoy@boldblindbeauty.com and I can respond? Thanks much!!

      1. Believe me Steph you never want to get in my head to meet all my issues. For me though my perspective of life changed September 2010 when my granddaughter was stillborn comparing anything with that well sightloss just doesn’t make the top ten worst things in my life

      2. You’re so right, it’s all about perspective and where we place our values.

  2. That is so great that she conquered all of those fears and finished the race with a new friend.

    1. Isn’t it though. I particularly like her running dialog in her head like so many of us have throughout the day yet she kept on going. Thank you for reading and commenting.

  3. I admire your courage, determination, bravery, and the endurance that even most of the average population does not have. Hats off to you Megan, your determination to finish no matter the circumstances, is truly an inspiration and hopefully an incentive to others that obstacles can be overcame even if you think they cannot. Congrats to you!!! Keep doing what you’re doing and show the world who you truly are.

    1. I will pass your lovely message on to Megan. Thank you

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