Lately I’ve been reflecting on days gone by when I was a painfully shy, skinny, awkward, dreamer of a young child. Being the subject of teasing taunts and ridicule, I was made to feel small, helpless and insignificant. Back then there were so many days I wanted to be anyone else except me. I remember not liking my hair, looks, skin and I loathed being bashful, and sensitive as I felt almost like a non-person.
Listening to my brother and cousin talking a couple of weeks ago about some of their escapades from ‘back in the day,’ I was wondering “where was I?” Their stories were so funny and very entertaining but I felt a slight pang of regret as I realized I wasn’t part of this particular history. Then it clicked, I was an uncool kid (had no real desire to be cool) so I wouldn’t have much to add to the dialogue <bummer>.
Matching bras and panties – was the topic of conversation when I was preparing to get ready for a midnight cruise on one of the Gateway Clipper Fleet’s riverboats. My friend, and co-worker Lorey, (who scored the tickets for this fun-filled event), invited me to her home where we would get dressed then go directly to the boat.
Since Lorey always looked like she just stepped off the cover of a fashion magazine it made sense that her home was equally stunning. For the life of me I cannot remember how we got on the subject of underwear but Lorey must have said something to the effect that all of hers matches to which I would have said “nah uh.” I do remember her showing me her underwear drawer and I just gasped in awe. Not only did all the pieces perfectly match but the way her drawer was set up greatly appealed to my OCD tendencies (I think I may have even drooled a bit).
I laugh to myself when I think about some of my goals because when I saw Lorey’s underwear drawer a new one formulated in my brain. I would come to know personal success when all my bras and panties matched. It seemed a worthwhile objective that would be easily achievable so I set out on a path to attaining said goal.
Planning my work and working my plan has been a roadmap that has yielded great results in my life that is, with the exception of that one simple goal that has eluded me. Oh it hasn’t been for the lack of trying and many times I came close but never quite hit the target so now I’m thinking that perhaps success doesn’t equate to matching bras and panties. Likewise, who we are isn’t tied to a singular trait on the contrary we are a culmination of our age, appearance, personality, ethnicity, race, belief system, life’s experiences and so much more. Being human is complex and beautiful when you think about our inner most being that makes us who we are.
Most days I like me and on days that I’m a tad frustrated with myself (I’m a harsh taskmaster) I take some time to gather my thoughts then refocus. The inspiration for today’s post came from the following quote that is also pictured:
Before you assume, learn the facts.
Before you judge, understand why.
Before you hurt someone, feel.
Before you speak, think.
~ Author Unknown
Just the facts ma’am
It bothers me that in today’s culture of instant gratification and the perceived anonymity of the internet, people pass along inaccurate information as gospel; we are quick to jump to conclusions without the full picture; empathy is virtually extinct and all too many times we type or post something without thoughtful consideration. While for the most part there are no do-overs in life there are second chances; but wouldn’t it great if we could at least at least alleviate second chances by living our lives by this simple quote?
Accepting people for who they are would be so easy if we just gave ourselves some time to become acquainted. Blanket statements and absolutes shouldn’t be used when describing a person or group of people as the outcome is a disservice to the person(s).
I originally hoped to write about my Color IQ experience however I have not had a chance to visit Sephora to get the consultation. Stay tuned…
“Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.” ~Judy Garland