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I’ve Got the Body Shape Blues

It’s a Lovely Day in the Neighborhood

Street style - Stella McCartney coat - PFW via Natalie AllaverdovaVisit
Street style – Stella McCartney coat – PFW
via Natalie Allaverdova

It’s such a great day to be alive! The sun is shining, the sky is a lovely shade of blue, the snow has ceased now for 3 days and though the current temperature is minus 3 with a wind chill of minus 16 it’s a good day.

As is my routine, I get up, head to the bathroom, then to the kitchen for my first cup of java. I fill up Mollie’s water bowl; feed her, then sit down at the computer to listen to my bible. After 2 more cups of coffee while checking my email I prepare to take Mollie outside for her first walk of the day. I bundle up, putting on sweats, fleece jacket over my tee-shirt, snow boots, furry headband, heavy hooded leather jacket, gloves and finally insert ear buds in the hopes that music will take my mind off the cold. I attach Mollie’s leash, grab 2 doggie bags, the garbage and I’m ready to take on the arctic weather.

As soon as I hit the crisp morning air I realize my grave error but I heroically trudge onward. “It’s not so bad out here” I tell myself as we head over to the garbage bins so I can rid myself of my trash. “Just breathe slowly through your nose” an inner voice tells me. “In, out, that’s it take it easy” the voice continues as Mollie is tugging on her leash “with her skinny legs and little paws surely she won’t want to be out her long” I think to myself.

Psychosomatic is a word I’m intimately familiar with and it’s one of the reasons I no longer review the side effects on prescribed or over the counter medications (if I think it or see it then it’s so). It then is no surprise that since I neglected to wear my cozy winter scarf, and I’m asthmatic, I begin to wheeze slightly.

ASOS sweatshirt, Lulu*s jacket c/o, Ann Taylor pants, Lauren Marinis shoes c/o, Zara bag (alternative), zeroUV sunglasses c/o, Makeup Forever 'Satin Black' lipstick Visit
ASOS sweatshirt | Lulu*s jacket | Ann Taylor pants |
Lauren Marinis shoes | Zara bag (alternative) |
zeroUV sunglasses | Makeup Forever ‘Satin Black’ lipstick

“Come on Mollie” I think as she tries to locate the ‘perfect’ spot to go potty. “It’s really cold out here” I say to myself. “Why didn’t I go back inside and grab my scarf?” It does no good now to review my utter stupidity or laziness. Then she goes. “Thank goodness” as I reach down, doggie bag in hand, to scoop the poop. Now if only I can make it back to the garbage bin to toss the offending doggie doo. By now, I’m almost gasping for air and thinking “it’s really going to be awful if I pass out from an asthma attack, and I don’t even have on my makeup” I whine.

We head back towards the apartment building, I unlock the security door and upon entering, gulp in a huge quantity of warm air. My lungs are so grateful but now I have to drag myself and Mollie up the one flight of stairs to get to my apartment.

With shaking hands, I unlock my apartment door, enter the entryway, disengage Mollie from her leash, while taking off my winter gear, and my brother who’s sitting on the couch in the living room asks “is it cold outside?” My first thought was to slug him, then, I remembered I had to get to my rescue inhaler to restore my strength.

After the medication soothes my ragged breathing I look at my younger sibling, count to twenty thousand and two then tell myself “walk away Steph, just walk away.”

So here I am, once again my composed self, sitting at my computer still procrastinating on approaching my topic for today’s post. I so did not want to have this discussion but I’ve put it off for as long as I could.

High Hopes

Street style - Laura Brown in Rosie Assoulin Visit
Street style – Laura Brown in Rosie Assoulin
via Natalie Allaverdova

Body shape, just thinking about these two small words together is enough to make me want to break out in hives. My body shape is not perfect and I’m okay with that. What I’m not okay with is not being able to fit into my clothes. Oh sure, I could go down to the gym (which happens to be in my building and was one of the positives on moving to this location) but why would I want to do such a thing? There are actually 5 reasons that immediately spring to mind:

  1. I would save money by not having to buy a new wardrobe to fit my increasing frame
  2. I would be able to wear my existing wardrobe
  3. Losing the extra pounds would be beneficial to my asthma
  4. Overall I would feel better and hopefully be healthier
  5. Lastly, increasing muscle mass to burn calories will enable me to take on my smug little brother

The reason for my trepidation in sharing this with you is I now have you to hold me accountable. It’s one thing to make a promise to, oneself, (it’s easier to break) but when making a public proclamation, it forces you to knock off the nonsense and get down to business.

So on today, January 29, 2014, I Stephanae McCoy do hereby state that I’m committing myself to a healthy lifestyle which includes but is not limited to: joining an online community such as weight watchers to help me in creating healthy eating habits, allowing my brother (yikes) to develop an exercise and weight program, I’ll buy a talking scale, I’ll open and then use the Wii Zumba Fitness that I bought about 4 months ago, “this part really hurts” I’ll cook at least once a week and finally I’ll update this blog with my efforts. As I’m typing this my brain is saying “Nooooooooooooooooo” don’t do it!!! But this is the sacrifice I have to make to achieve the goal of good health and being able to feel good.

I really do believe that when you feel good you look good and for me this will begin with a healthy lifestyle. It’s not going to be easy because I’ve developed many bad habits over the years like eating too much candy, salty snacks, sugary drinks and I hate exercise.

Unfortunately, I am not able to divulge my weight at the moment because in a fit of disgust I gave the scale away about 2 months ago. However, as soon as I get the new one I will update you weekly on my weight loss. By April I estimate that I will be able to post pictures of myself with a more reasonable body shape that’s suitable for my frame.

In the meantime on Wednesdays I will continue to post some of my favorite outfits with the idea that once I am down to my ideal weight (my doctors says about 140 pounds) I’ll then be able to display my wardrobe on my person. Also, I plan to dive into clothing that looks best per specific body shape.

I would love to hear from you by commenting below or you can send me an email directly at to share your thoughts.

Thank you for listening to my tale of woe, this is sure to be an interesting journey. And I can’t wait to figure out how to shoot video and upload to the blog.

“Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be, because sooner or later, if you are posing, you will forget the pose, and then where are you?” ~Fanny Brice

6 thoughts on “I’ve Got the Body Shape Blues

  1. Years ago I became very over weight while pregnant and on bed rest. After birth, a nurse told me about Pilates. I am hooked! I love the movements. I love exercise and view it as therapeutic rather than work. I begin my day with my exercise and it clears my mind.

  2. Hey! What happened to the treadmill you were doing so well? Well, right now I’m doing 15 min after breakfast and when I get home for after lunch. Then after supper, I do 15 min. This is a total of 45 min a day. I know i owne my own treadmill; however, you just said, “I have a gym downstairs from my apartment.” Well, what’s the problem? Mentioning the temp for this A.M. didn’t help either. Baby, I know it cold.

    1. Since my asthma’s been acting up non-stop this was my excuse to not use the treadmill. But it’s gotten to the point that I can’t fit any of my clothes and I’ve got to get myself under control.

      1. OOPs! I forgot the running affects your asthma. What happened to the fresh produce you were buying? I know how expensive they can ; but they do help. If you join Weight Watchers; no more candy, chips ,etc However, when it’s cold please wear you scarf around your nose and mouth.

  3. Alicia, I am so with you on this one. Yeah, most of my weight is actually tied between my middle and my bottom, lol. And don’t even get me started on the change between the private summers and weight gain due to hormonal shifts I feel llike I’m descending into madness.

    Losing and then gaining inches has also been a battle. Oh well, we aren’t alone and I think if we can agree to hole each other accountable it makes the journey more interesting and doable.

  4. How about we hold each other accountable?
    I struggle with trying to lose weight because it’s difficult for me to exercise. However, I am back on Atkins and am working out inside when it’s too cold to walk outside (like it has been this week!). My biggest problem is I carry my weight around the middle. I’m also going through the change so, even though I’ve lost seven pounds I gained an inch around my waist 🙁


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